Requesiat in Pace, Carrie 5/9/1979-10/25/2010



Carrie is the one on the far left in pink.
I'm the blond in the stripes.





Shades of Pink

*for Sizzle, who encouraged me to wear pink

In a heartbeat,

a heartbeat stops.





How the road must have been enclosed

in a snowy silence

and all of nature frozen, confused

by the sound of destruction

and screaming of metal.

Afterward.

Somehow "instantaneously"

brings me no comfort.

Surely you were a fighter--

You lingered the span of lifetimes,

if only for a split second.

Physical pain didn't scare you.

And if it did, you walked through it.

You believed

it was temporary.

I didn't know until today

that you were, too.

In peaceful moments,

I picture you in those last few seconds

Your ears filled with the sound of
"Boogie Shoes" or Liz Phair or Stevie Nicks,

singing to an audience of birds and the trees...

But most of the time,

I picture you powerless

trapped in a cage of steel

hurdling towards death--

a place of excruciating silence.

Everyone says it was a blessing

that you died clean.

They say that 11 years is a miracle.

Messages of comfort bring me anger.

Right now, all i know

is that

you are gone.