The nurse furrows her brow in confusion.
Slippery coldness as the magic wand glides over my abdomen.
A pause; impassable silence.
Listening, we strain our ears and the world holds it’s breath.
There!
Sunday, March 11, 2012
punctuation counts
A Trifecta challenge: this weekend's challenge is to give us a story or snippet of a story which includes, in exactly 33 words, a justified exclamation point. Make us believe that your exclamation point simply needs to be in your story.
The nurse furrows her brow in confusion.
Slippery coldness as the magic wand glides over my abdomen.
A pause; impassable silence.
Listening, we strain our ears and the world holds it’s breath.
There!
The nurse furrows her brow in confusion.
Slippery coldness as the magic wand glides over my abdomen.
A pause; impassable silence.
Listening, we strain our ears and the world holds it’s breath.
There!
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12 comments:
This made me want to cheer! Been there! :P
Oh yes, that little heartbeat makes the slimy belly worthwhile every time, doesn't it?
Oh yes, that little heartbeat makes the slimy belly worthwhile every time, doesn't it?
This is great! Very well done :)
I am so glad I found your blog. I think that you must have dozens of ideas because of what you do every day. And even your description about locking up the scissors could lead to a story or even a book. Looking forward to reading more.
I love this one! Very personal to me because it portrays such special times in my life. I was lucky to have two safe and much wished-for pregnancies. Your 33 words were so compelling. Thanks for sharing!
Exciting times.
love this!
best,
MOV
Very moving. Been a nurse in Adolescent RTC. Much there. Now work with adults, overgrown adolescents... But OB is the greatest form of nursing. Evelyn
Thanks so much for linking up. It would be a very harsh critic who would deny a writer an exclamation mark for that -- it was absolutely merited. This is a great response to the prompt. Hope to see you for the weekday challenge too.
vivid imagery.
http://promisingpoetsparkinglot.blogspot.com/2015/02/hyde-park-poetry-palace-thursdy-poets.html
come on in, share a poem and read others.
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